Those Living for Death, Will Die by their Own Hands.

People aren’t suicidal because they glorify the idea of ending it all. They’re suicidal merely because they convince themselves that this is the easy way out, because life has become a living hell to them & death seems to make it all better sooner than anticipated.

They convince themselves that they are no longer cared for & that life holds no meaning. They drown themselves in helpless thoughts about how lifeless they are, & how their presence is nothing to this world because they won’t be missed. That or the fact that death will put an end to their miserable life, cause’  they can’t stand it.

& the thing is, we don’t know wether to pity or look down upon the once miserable man that walked among us. In a way, we the people are to blame for his choice, his thoughts, his anguish & his despair.

A man cared for after death isn’t much cared for at all. Those who really cared might’ve been too helpless themselves, & those who weren’t became blind to everyone else’s problems. We are those who are blind because we just look the other way since we don’t want to get involved. Its pathetic but true.

The only way people like us comfort ourselves is by judging the dead man. Some of us think he didn’t have a purpose in life so its a good thing he died, others think that he wasn’t much use to them anyway & some just think that he wouldn’t have helped us if we were in the same position. But we can never know. Deep down though, we all know if we wanted, we could’ve done something to stop someone from dying.

So the only thing we achieve by the end of it all is that we throw away our guilt, fumble over words when you finally say goodbye, & then its all over. He’s been buried along with all your thoughts of him 6 feet under, though you still carry a little of it with youu, not knowingly I suppose. As you walk away, no one knows how or what you feel because everyone is too busy feeling the same way yourself. So now, each of us feels like the man who we just buried – alone, confused, desolated & wanting to be heard. But no one says a word.

Thus we once again find an excuse to be self absorbed, thinking about how the his death affected us & not the other way around. We forget all about the man who killed himself all because he was helpless to say what he needed from those around him because we never looked up and saw the real person inside him.

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