This is the last you’ll see of this 16 year old.

I’m turning 17 tomorrow & yes, I’m slightly bummed out about that because my 16th year has been one of the best years of my life yet & I still feel like there’s a lot more that’s gonna happen but it’s the 7th of October now & I doubt it.
So this is my 1st birthday in Pakistan after about 10 years &  the 1st birthday of my life without my dad, & brother being there [well after my brother was born anyway]. Also, this is the 1st birthday in about 9 years that Hera’s not going in. Basically it feels weird.
The last 12 months of my life have been absolutely amazing, with me graduating from high school after my last senior year [which seems like eons ago]. This is also the 1st birthday I’m having which doesn’t involve me going to school the next day. The reason why this feels like such a big deal is because I feel like I’ve grown up – a little too fast. It was just 12 months ago that I was studying Biology today back in Saudi & sighing about how A level sucks & how I gotta get an A.
It’s been 12 months since the whole Junaid episode & on this day today & a whole year ago I didn’t know Abdullah or Sarosh or anyone who seems slightly important to me now.  A year ago today, I was just fitting into NW & I hardly talked to any of the girls in my class & seemed very uncertain about everything.
12 months from then, I have my A level grades in my hand, I’m being called for interviews at the universities I’m applying at & everything just doesn’t seem real anymore .. for so long I’ve been preparing for the day I finally get called a med student & now that the day’s so close, I feel like rewinding everything.
I feel like reliving what I went through this year – each memory is so valuable to me that I never wanna forget anything at all starting from the heartbreaks, all the way to each & every joke I shared with my family or friends.

I’ll definitely miss family movie nights, or dressing up for weekend parties in my compound, going out late at night to just see my bestfriend, studying A level Biology & going out the mall once a month. I’m gonna miss the car I’ll never drive & my old crush who I’ll never see again. I’m gonna miss calling myself 16 & feeling happy about that cause’ that’s still 2 years away from being legal.

Most of all I’ll miss today too, even though I didn’t do anything special today, it’s just pretty important to me because of what I’m going to be parting with. I’ll be embracing a new year, prepare for new memories & new problems because I know, that’s just life.

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